Dr. Seth Meyers, Clinical Psychologist

Dr. Seth Meyers, Clinical Psychologist

Thursday, January 20, 2011

5 Keys to Making Long Distance Relationships Work


Simply put, long distance relationships are challenging. Distance makes it difficult to sustain an emotional and physical connection with your partner. It can also bring out insecurities in one or both partners. For reasons such as these, the odds are truly stacked against those of you who go head to head with the one-eyed distance monster.

If you are going to give a long distance relationship a shot, try using the following techniques to ensure that your relationship has a decent chance at lasting.

Tip # 1: Tell your partner what your long-term goal is for the relationship, and ask him or her to share the same. Marriage? Living together? Living in the same city? Be clear from the beginning.

Tip # 2: Have a “Fears Discussion.” Tell your partner “I’m kind of afraid if we live apart for too long that you might…or that I might…” Again, ask your partner to share his or her fears. This is how intimacy develops.

Tip # 3: Create set times to communicate on the phone.

Tip # 4: Arrange a visiting schedule that will allow you to see each other regularly and stick to this schedule.

Tip # 5: Be honest if you start feeling disconnected from your partner, and ask your partner to share the same feelings if he or she has the same feelings – at that point or ever!

Again, these relationships aren’t easy, but nobody said that true love is a walk in the park. Arm yourself with good coping skills and you will be better off in the end - in your long distance relationship, as well as all of your other relationships in life.

PLUS: In Dr. Seth's new book, Dr. Seth's Love Prescription (available at Amazon.com or in stores at Borders and Barnes and Noble), he shows you how to stop repeating bad patterns in your romantic relationships. He sheds light on the four patterns that get repeated the most: saving wounded souls; focusing too much on a specific, physical type; fear of intimacy and denial; and getting involved with people who are physically, verbally, or psychologically abusive. Pick up a copy today!

2 comments:

sussyb said...

hi everybody,,magic is real,just believed that some weeks ago i guess,and the funny thing is i learnt it the hard way..i had been married for four years with two kids and thought everything in my marriage was perfect and extraordinary,my husband was the most loving and my whole family was happy until everything changed..don't know how or what happened but i guess i didn't believe it was my fault.he started hitting me and my kids,cheating and we started having dept cos he was gambling quite much and he had lost his job..A friend introduced me to some counselors and therapist but it didn't get well,it was getting worse so i decided to go the spiritual angle..After several attempts with different spell casters and magicians nothing happened.i met some people online who claimed to know someone who claimed to be able to help but it was all false,i lost a lot of money,was scammed several times and cheated on...i guess i was too desperate for a quick solution,but it all changed when i was introduced to a spell caster online,i thought he was going to be fake,maybe try to scam me again so i was prepared this time,i thought at least i could get him caught or something..but he wasn't what it thought he was,he did some spell which i used playing along,but he was right,he was true..everything stated to turn around,my husband came home,he was changing and everything was going back to normal..and now after three weeks,everything is perfect and much more..my family is back,he has a new job,i do too..and we are happy as ever..i guess magic truly exist but in the right people with the right heart..magic is real and out there so is the person who saved my marriage,my family and i...


bainessuseee gmail com

Unknown said...

Long Distance Relationship
I was prepared for it. We were business associates before making a commitment. At the beginning it was just the net and telephone to connect us. He always have time to talk to me every single day. I even go further by accepting to live in his country, bring up his 3 kids as my own. He was dying to see me (as what he claims)
The first visit to his country after our relationship started was a total disaster.
- He promised but he did not take me to see his family.. never introduced. He called it circumstances which cannot be avoided. I accepted.
I was there for 3 weeks for our mutual business, he come to see me 1-2 hours in 2-3 days. He claimed to be very busy and never spend the night with me.
So when I went back home I had second thoughts. When I imply this to him he was mad. A person who is ever so loving starts to be someone insulting, hurting etc.
We broke up - he came back.
All questions left unanswered but he told me that I doubted him, that is why he is mad.
I wish there was no room for doubts so that I won't.
Now we are still trying to put the pieces together..no promises..no plans..according to him we should put all behind us and continue. I can't gulp it all up when there are so many questions left unanswered.
I guess the love is there and we will let time decide.
Honestly speaking I am not so keen anymore. I was prepared to sacrifice my life and home and migrate to an unknown place because I trusted him..but now I am not sure I should. I had a bad marriage ..alone for 14 years till he came along. It was not easy for me to love somebody and I am willing to try to keep him.
But .. I really don’t know if I should take this bold step anymore.