Monday, February 7, 2011
Yikes: Everybody's Getting Divorced!
Take a guess – which rate would you expect to be lower? Below I have included the rates for first, second, and third marriages.
•Divorce rate in America after first marriage is from 41% to 50%.
•US divorce rate after second marriage is from 60% to 67%
•After 3 marriages the US divorce rate is from 73% to 74%
Why, would you guess, is the rate higher for later marriages?
Having examined a wide array of research on divorce in the past, I know how complex the interpretation of divorce statistics is. Yet here is one of the simple reasons why divorce statictics are higher for later marriages: After having your first marriage fail because it was not meeting your needs, you are often less likely to put up with another marriage later that doesn't meet your needs. In essence, you know yourself better after your first marriage, including what you want and need from a relationship. That said, these statistics are high and underscore the need for individuals to carefully choose their partners from the very beginning.
(Source for Statistics cited: Aboutdivorce.org.)
PLUS: In Dr. Seth's new book, Dr. Seth's Love Prescription (available at Amazon.com or in stores at Borders and Barnes and Noble), he shows you how to stop repeating bad patterns in your romantic relationships. He sheds light on the four patterns that get repeated the most: saving wounded souls; focusing too much on a specific, physical type; fear of intimacy and denial; and getting involved with people who are manipulative or abusive. The book walks you step step through the process of stopping the cycle of repetition.