Thursday, April 29, 2010
GUEST BLOGGER: Amanda Kane, LSW
A Room of One’s Own
Couples frequently grapple with balancing their individual needs with those of the partnership. It is not usually an easy balance to strike. Individuals often seek therapy for relationship related issues, and too little or too much time with a partner is a very common theme. What is the solution?
If you live with your partner and feel you need more personal space—whether that space is metaphorical or not—consider turning part of your shared living space into an area just for you and you alone. Now, this isn’t as selfish it may sound. Having a space to yourself can definitely benefit your relationship. Autonomy and individuality do not go out the door because people get married or move-in together. Carving out a space for yourself to pursue your interests is a concrete manifestation of your own individuality. It is perfectly healthy to have privacy and separateness even in the context of a relationship. Everyone has varying needs in this regard.
If your partner protests about your special workroom, man cave, or craft room, then suggest that the two of you find an area where your partner can carve out special space as well.