Dr. Seth Meyers, Clinical Psychologist

Dr. Seth Meyers, Clinical Psychologist

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

GUEST BLOGGER: Amanda Kane, LSW


MENTAL HEALTH TIP OF THE DAY: Just Say No

I'm a big believer in self care. All too often we (women especially) puts the needs of others--kids, partners, parents, friends...before our own. Many clients tell me about dinner parties they should attend, bake sales they should bake for, the latest Oprah book club pick that they should read. The list of shoulds goes on and on. It is very important to learn how to say "no" to excessive commitments that drain your time and energy. Saying "no" may feel uncomfortable and unfamiliar at first. It may trigger feelings of guilt, but luckily the more you practice the easier it becomes.

Instead of berating yourself with what you "should" be doing, ask yourself what you really want to do. Would your prefer to read a trashy paperback to The New York Times bestseller gathering dust on your bedside table? Do you want to skip out on your tedious co-worker's dinner party and go home to a bubble bath? Sometimes we don't give ourselves enough choices and live life according to what should be done. So, the next time you feel obligated, ask yourself if this is something that is really necessary. If it isn't, then practice saying "no, I just can't."

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